Mar. 19th, 2013

msfledermaus: (Mausi with bag)
I started goofing around with an online as-I-read-it review of 50 Shades of Gray. I love, LOVE to read bad books, and I started this on Facebook for a lark. But my coworkers kept running up to me demanding I keep going, because they didn't want to read it themselves but were curious. I read the Goodreads review with all the hilarious GIFS, so I knew going in it was going to be a bumpy ride...

"It's wicked cold out today, and to keep us warm I will be reviewing sections of 50 Shades of Gray as I read it, since a coworker was kind enough to lend it to me. (She knows I adore horrible books, and couldn't hand that sucker over fast enough.) Chapter one: Good heavens, if I was a scary type-A business type, I couldn't get rid of Clumsy Miss Steele fast enough. Then I'd console myself by having a sushi lunch balanced precariously on the backs of my interns. Then maybe I'd kill an endangered species with my bare hands for dinner. Erm...why do people like this guy?"

And Chapter Two:
"Time for more fun with "50 Shades of Buh", my as-I-read-it book review...Chapter Two: Okay, Patrick Bateman/Christian Grey just met Miss Fumbly, and he's already stalking her at the hardware store where she works.Ewwww... Now I'm already writing a satire version of this book in my head: "50 Shades of Metallic-Gray" where Miss Steele is the little sister of Dr. Phineas Waldorf Steel, crazed musician and inventor, and she works at the hardware store so she gets discounts on robot parts... Chapter two, people, and I'm already making up better plots! Not good, people!"

More soon, just as soon as I can hack through more chapters. When my brain gets too full of horribleness, I'll switch over to "The Omnivore's Dilemma" by Michael Pollan to save my sanity...

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