10 things that will get you fired...
Nov. 12th, 2007 08:36 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
msfledermausI was checking my e-mail this morning and on the home page, among the various celebrities doing stupid things and whatnot was a listing: "10 things that will get you fired."
Humph, that's an easy list to compile! Incredibly easy! I can do that without even thinking about it too hard!!
*ahem*
Ms Mausi's list of 10 things that will get you fired...
Coming to your job wearing a chicken suit and carrying a bottle of vodka and a machete.
Turbo-mooning your boss at the water cooler.
Answering your phone, "Hot Dixie's Dominatrix line! Please hold!"
Grabbing money from each and every wallet and purse you can get your hands on and stuffing the money down your pants, yelling, "Who wants to try to get their money back?!? Hah?! Hah?!?!"
Dangling your boss off the roof with a bungee cord.
Sending all the company mail to an address in Watts.
Sticking raw shrimp in all the computers.
Dumping a sack of flour in your boss's office and then rolling around in it.
Photoshopping your HR director's face into something involving animals.
Taking the company van to get detailed...in Mexico...
And that's just off the top of my head. I bet you all have even better ones:)
Humph, that's an easy list to compile! Incredibly easy! I can do that without even thinking about it too hard!!
*ahem*
Ms Mausi's list of 10 things that will get you fired...
Coming to your job wearing a chicken suit and carrying a bottle of vodka and a machete.
Turbo-mooning your boss at the water cooler.
Answering your phone, "Hot Dixie's Dominatrix line! Please hold!"
Grabbing money from each and every wallet and purse you can get your hands on and stuffing the money down your pants, yelling, "Who wants to try to get their money back?!? Hah?! Hah?!?!"
Dangling your boss off the roof with a bungee cord.
Sending all the company mail to an address in Watts.
Sticking raw shrimp in all the computers.
Dumping a sack of flour in your boss's office and then rolling around in it.
Photoshopping your HR director's face into something involving animals.
Taking the company van to get detailed...in Mexico...
And that's just off the top of my head. I bet you all have even better ones:)
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-11-12 05:52 pm (UTC)My father once claimed to have put a kipper behind the radiator in the typing pool, and it took them a long time to find the smell. The words "typing pool" give you an idea of how long ago this was.
> Photoshopping your HR director's face into something involving animals.
Someone I knew once photoshopped the boss's girlfriend out of her bikini and put it on everyone's computer. I don't think he was sacked because (a) he made a terrible job of it and (b) it was a bit of a novelty back then that you could do such a thing.
> Answering your phone, "Hot Dixie's Dominatrix line! Please hold!"
"No, I said stay on the line, you snivelling worm. Wait I'm ready to deal with you, or there'll be a considerable price to pay for you disobedience. And be quiet!"
Oops - that was much too enjoyable!
*snicker*
Date: 2007-11-12 07:16 pm (UTC)and I think the Hot Dixie thing would be the end of one job and the beginning of another...*snickers more*
*collapses into a total giggle-fit,hiding face from coworkers*
no subject
Date: 2007-11-12 10:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-11-13 12:04 pm (UTC)