Funky Ms Eff's Psychic Hotline!!!

[msfledermaus]

That's right!!!

For a limited time, I will gaze deeply into my Crystal rock-thing and tell your futures!!!
Your love lives, your financial stuff, your deepest, darkest secrets!!! and it's free, free, freeee!!!
(there's a catch--I'm not that good..okay, I'm REALLY not that good. But I guarantee you'll get your money's worth. *grin*)

Ms Eff, wrapping a big turban around her head full of chimes and jingles...

Comments

[dreaming-soul.livejournal.com]

Oh... Ms Eff!! What's my future?

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

Do me! Do me!
(I gotta stop yelling that. Men get the wrong idea)

Please gaze into your crystal-rock thingy and tell me what you see in my future.

[ex-ilona40.livejournal.com]

Me too! Me Too!!!!
pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!!!

[dangerpest.livejournal.com]

ask the crystal where my car keys are ;]

-p

Re:

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

*Gazes into the Crystal rock*

I see...Hmm, it's all sparkly, lemme adjust this thing...Okay. I see people trying to hurt your feelings because they're mean-spirited dildoheads...and something bad happens, lots of mace and you wearing riot gear--wait, that was Seattle, lemme try this again...

I see your shining, happy soul floating through
tinted clouds while you sleep, bringing their color to your life when you wake up. I see gauzy thoughts that fade like mist when you wake up, leaving nothing but a happy shimmer. (sometime next Monday or Tuesday, when you really need it.) I also see a file cabinet, full of categorized thoughts. Or you may have to do some filing for someone, whichever...

Ms Eff, sees all, knows, uhhh, some stuff.

Re:

[dreaming-soul.livejournal.com]

LOL i love it thank you, Ms Eff

Re:

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Okay, I see you being chased down the virtual block by crazed men inflamed by all this "do me" stuff. Kevin has to get out the firehose, and the National Guard comes to your rescue.
Some of them start sing "YMCA" and gat a big round of applause....

And I see ...the socks of teenagers!!! Avoid them at all costs!!! You may need to bury them!!! (Maybe the National guard can help?)

Oh, and I see Kid Rock helping with gardening somewhere..wait, thats Kev...No, wait, that IS Kid Rock...weird...

Ms Eff, sees um....Kid Rock with gardening gloves?

Oh, Great Seer of Things To Come.....

[majikgrove.livejournal.com]

i wanna knooooooooow.......

will i have babies, and WITH WHO?

(i know that's soooo lame, but i cant even think of anything else i'd want to know!!! I have enough trouble processing the present, let alone dealing with the future!)

Re:

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I see you strutting and fretting your time onstage,looking fabulous and people (me) jumping up and down, going "woowoo!" a lot, and throwing flowers at you...they may just be clover blossoms...And beware the geese!!! I see a definite mugging attempt by geese in your near future!!! Your lunch will be a little lame unless you pick something good right now this second. Don't eat any pickles you see today.

I also see some little red-haired girl flirting and flipping her panties at people later this summer...like that's a revelation:)

Ms Eff...your deep dark secrets are safe with me...but jeez, Kool-whip?

As long as this doesn't involve bad accordion music....

[serendipity.livejournal.com]

...I'd love to have you tell my fortune!

Re:

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Hmmm...I see a couple of lawn gnomes playing with them...that can't be right. Now they're trying to flush them down the toilet. Great, oh, eew, now they're getting earwax all over them!!!...

Wait, wait, I see them putting them in an old pants pocket in the laundry...you may want to wash those pants first...eew...

Free Psychic Help

[joei.livejournal.com]

I actually got an email from Ms. Cleo saying she had a vision and learned something exciting about me. She suggested I call her to find out what it was all about.

I think I like your offer of a free reading better.

Give it a go! *standing in front of my computer with pom pons waving* Are people supposed to cheerlead psychics? Rah rah!!

Re:

[dangerpest.livejournal.com]

wow. you ARE good. i will never doubt the powers of psychics again ;]

-p

Re: As long as this doesn't involve bad accordion music....

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I see the blooming of fruit trees,the caressing of soft air...and me jumping up and down and screaming every time you describe them in loving detail at me when it gets colder this year...You have a sadistic streak, you do...Beware the copier today, it means only evil, and someone's laid eggs in it's stomach.
Post-it's are your best friends tomorrow, trust them like your own self...

I see..a package!!! yes, a little tan package in yur mailbox!! Hmm..no walleye in it, though...
It goes *thump* when you put it on the table...
but then I see dancing around with a little girl early next week. I also see croutons...(Croutons? am I picking up Julia child again? Drat this thing!)

[elysiangirl.livejournal.com]

do you seehamburger patties in my future - 'cause that's what i'm fittna eat. do you see hot grease being spit all over me from the frying pan? no, that's the past not the future. do you see the fence being fixed before it decomposes? most importantly, do you see glitter in my near future???

what do you see?

Re: Oh, Great Seer of Things To Come.....

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Yes, there will be babies...but why do I keep seeing David Hasselhoff as the father? It doesn't look good. There's a lot of them, and they're all smiling like their dad...I'm scared of your children, Grove...

..See, I told you I wasn't very good at this...

Ms Eff...the babies..the Hasselhoff babies!!!

Re:

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Hey, I see all, know, ummm, a few things:)

(Keys are always in the pants pockets, I find.)

Re: As long as this doesn't involve bad accordion music....

[serendipity.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm nowhere near a copier and will ensure it stays that way. Better stock up on post-its!

*Seren, jumping up and down in anticipation of the little tan package in her mailbox!

Re: Free Psychic Hindrance...

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I like cheerleading..

Okay, I see a messy house, and uhh..cyn leading the National Guard over to clean it up..(They're sing YMCA and they're dripping wet, for some reason.)
I see someone bringing you a present soon.
And a funny moment that makes you go, "AAAugh!" and makes you laugh and laugh.
that's next week sometime. I see you blowing your lunch hour reading LJ stuff, too...(Like that's rare:)

Ms Eff, who can kick Ms Cleo's psychic hinder any time, any where, bebeh...

Re:

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Glitter!!! I see it!!! I see the glitter!!! OOOh, pretty! Next week, early!!

And I do see hamburger belches in your future
as well as tiny grease stains on your shirt. The fence will sit there for a while longer, but your landlord will be locked up for tax evasion and contempt of court for mooning a judge.

so there you are.

Re: Oh, Great Seer of Things To Come.....

[majikgrove.livejournal.com]

HASSELHOFF BABIES?
What are you trying to do, kill me???

-Majik, running out the door to get her tubes tied....

[elysiangirl.livejournal.com]

oooo - now all i have to do is sit back and wait! glitter and hamburger belches! does it get any better than this???

[redthread.livejournal.com]

Me next!! Me next!! I need to know!!!

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

oooooo!! This is SO much more entertaining than my daily horoscope.

Do you think Kid Rock and Kev are actually twins separated at birth?

Re: Oh, Great Seer of Things To Come.....

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Whoops...

Sorry, Honey. Maybe we could instead get a t-shirt with the logo, "Get away from my ovaries, David Hasselhoff!!" You won't have to get yur tubes tied and that'll stop the man cold...*grin*

Ms Eff,with the silkscreening kit...