A Discovery Channel moment...
Dec. 21st, 2001 02:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
msfledermaus...The Americanized Fledermaus, unlike other members of it's species, is easily transfixed by the sight and smell of chocolate. Usually if an American Fledermaus finds chocolate in it's natural habitat of mazelike cubicles, art galleries and danceterias, the results are very predictable.
*Documentary shot of a small pile of Godiva chocolates suddenly being swooped on by a shadowy figure*
The Fledermaus will secure the chocolate, take it to a secure location, and consume as much as possible.
*Documentary shot of Ms Eff snarfing Godivas and grinning with a chocolate-smeared face*
Then there is a phenomenon seen very rarely in nature...the Fledermaus will then begin to
have a strong physical reaction to the chemicals in the chocolate.
*Shot of Ms Eff running around her workplace like a tornado, going "Whooop! Whooooop!Whoooop!" and laughing hysterically*
The effect wears off after time, but gives us a most interesting insight into the life and behaviors of this strange offshoot of the Bat species....
*Documentary shot of a small pile of Godiva chocolates suddenly being swooped on by a shadowy figure*
The Fledermaus will secure the chocolate, take it to a secure location, and consume as much as possible.
*Documentary shot of Ms Eff snarfing Godivas and grinning with a chocolate-smeared face*
Then there is a phenomenon seen very rarely in nature...the Fledermaus will then begin to
have a strong physical reaction to the chemicals in the chocolate.
*Shot of Ms Eff running around her workplace like a tornado, going "Whooop! Whooooop!Whoooop!" and laughing hysterically*
The effect wears off after time, but gives us a most interesting insight into the life and behaviors of this strange offshoot of the Bat species....
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no subject
Date: 2001-12-21 12:14 pm (UTC)Very Cute....
Re:
Date: 2001-12-21 12:22 pm (UTC)I thought it was kinda funny....
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Date: 2001-12-21 12:28 pm (UTC)Sheesh.
*wanders off*
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Date: 2001-12-21 12:32 pm (UTC)sorry about the bite marks on the handles...I got a little carried away...
*sniff*
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Date: 2001-12-21 12:44 pm (UTC)Damn pith helmet. Nnng.
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Date: 2001-12-21 12:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2001-12-21 01:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2001-12-21 02:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2001-12-21 02:48 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2001-12-21 02:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2001-12-21 02:58 pm (UTC)Have you seen this?
Date: 2001-12-21 01:40 pm (UTC)Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived from either sugar CANE or sugar BEETS. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category. Thus, chocolate is a vegetable.
To go one step further, chocolate candy bars also contain milk, which is dairy. So candy bars are a health food.
Chocolate-covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite, and you'll eat less.
If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves. (We're testing this with other snack foods as well.)
If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?
Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. Therefore, you need to eat more chocolate.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Now, isn't that handy?
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?
If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated. You can't let that happen, can you?
(P.S. from Seren: Don't forget that stressed backwards is desserts!)
Re: Have you seen this?
Date: 2001-12-21 02:17 pm (UTC)And just stressed is now my just desserts...and how sweet it is.
no subject
Date: 2001-12-21 03:35 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2001-12-26 07:20 am (UTC)