Ms Mausi's Ode to Kyle Mclaughlin...

[msfledermaus]

Kyle, Kyle Mclaughlin, you twisted,fantastic man,
I promise never to lock you in a room and claim I'm "You're Number One Fan";
Of the moody deep-eyed actors, your jawline is king;
I mean, what's not to like about they guy who beats up both "Bob" and Sting?
Your sense of humor's evident, your brown eyes make us swoon;
let's face it, you're the only reason we all sat through "Dune."
Oh, I would be your Audrey, though I'm too short to be Sean Young,
But please don't ask for me to be anyone from "Showgirls"for I'd scream like a maniac and run, baby run run run!!!

I'd make you real hot coffee, and I'd make you damn good pie,
I'd give David Lynch a backrub, just to be near you and sigh,
"My god, that's Kyle Mclaughlin, there he is, right in the flesh!"
Heck, I'd even shine the shoes of Hunter Thompson and John Tesh.
I'd even sit through "Showgirls"
for a dozen times or more,
Oh Kyle, sweet Kyle, At least you weren't
With Jack Palance in "Outlaw of Gor"....

I guess what I'm trying to say....
Is, Kyle, you make my surreal David-Lynchian-Nightmare-infested-pi-cravin'-coffee-nerves day........