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[personal profile] msfledermaus
I give you:

--------- OFFICIAL MINNESOTA TEMPERATURE CONVERSION  CHART
(With my added notes as a native Minnesotan.)

60 Above
New Jerseyites try to turn  on the heat.
People in MN plant  gardens
(Basil...definitely basil this season...)

50  Above
Californians shiver  uncontrollably
People in MN  sunbathe
(What? Sounds good to me? Where's my suit?)

40  Above
Italian and English cars won't  start
People in MN drive with the windows down
(And with the top down, of course!!!)

32 Above
Distilled  water freezes
Lake Mille Lacs water gets thicker
(We still make sand castles, though.)

20  Above
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves and  woolly hats.
People in MN throw on a flannel shirt
(Maybe...that could get kinda warm, though.)

15  Above
Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the  heat
People in MN have the last cookout before it gets too cold.
(Hey, who wants the last Bratwurst?)

Zero
People in  Miami all die
Minnesotans lick the  flagpole
("I DARE You!!" "I DOUBLE DOG dare you!!!" *snicker*)

20  Below
Iowans fly away to Mexico
People in MN get out their winter coats
(Well, it's getting a little chilly now, dontcha know...hot dish?)

40  Below
Hollywood disintegrates
The Girl Scouts  in MN are selling cookies door to door
(Thin Mints? Yes please!)

60  Below
Polar bears begin to evacuate the  Arctic
MN Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it  gets cold
enough
(Hey, ya gotta build character!)

80  Below
Mt. St. Helen's freezes
In MN,  schools consider closing early
(But they don't...and neither does work. No big deal:))

100  Below
Santa Claus abandons the North  Pole
Minnesotans get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg
(Hey, it's a long winter, ya know? Ole, get the torch out, willya?)

297 Below
Microbial  life no longer survives on dairy products
Cows in MN complain about  farmers with cold hands
(*MOOOOOOOO!*)

460  Below
All atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin  Scale)
People in MN start saying "cold nuff for  ya?"
("Oh ya, but it ain't like the winter of 1998, no sir...")

500 Below
Hell  freezes over
The Minnesota Vikings win the Super Bowl.
(Oh golly, Marge, lookit that there!)


...And I should mention we ice cream no matter what the temperatures say outside.
*slurps coffee heath bar crunch ice cream*


 

MN WINTER

Date: 2003-02-10 03:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] honeytiger.livejournal.com
Although I am not a native Minnesotan, hailing as I do from sunny South Africa, I'm still the girl who wore sandals all through winter back there and got some VERY funny looks...:o)

Re: MN WINTER

Date: 2003-02-10 05:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msfledermaus.livejournal.com
*snicker*
You were destined to be a Minnesotan, I think:)

Re: MN WINTER

Date: 2003-02-10 05:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] honeytiger.livejournal.com
Yah - you betcha! LOL!!! Hope you're feeling better today...:o)

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