Small happy stuff...

[msfledermaus]

...I've been in up-and-down Freakout mode lately. I was wrestling on and off for a week with the nurse I'd been talking to about my preop appointment. I finally had to book it through their main desk to make sure I could get in. I hate doctors. The whole stupid thing--needing the surgery, having the date loom over my other plans and obligations, what the surgery means to me as a person--it's been really depressing. I know lots of people have a *lot* more trouble than me lately, that in fact I'm very lucky--I have health insurance, this isn't life-threatening, it could be a hell of a lot worse. But I fret and cry and mope anyway...I'm even annoying myself:(


So I've been doing little happy things to help me feel better. I made a huge square orange and chocolate marble cake shaped like a ziggurat with the words "Yum yum" engraved in the frosting on top. I knitted an earflap hat with fox ears for Captain Emily. I spun some orange-and pink and yellow and white wool into this sort of dreamsicle candy-looking stuff. I've been using Harry Potter as a sleeping pill, and cooking shrimp and pasta and napping and whatnot...the little stuff helps amazingly. Now I'm trying to figure out what to knit with the dreamsicle stuff. Hat? Purse? Pillow? Wristlets? Maybe I should make more and knit a scarf...

Anyway, more later, there's a party later in the breakroom for our boss, and this should be a good good thing:)

Comments

[halfmoon-mollie.livejournal.com]

I've sort of guessed at the reason for your surgery. If you would like someone to talk to, I'd be happy to talk to you.

Any surgery is nasty. So, yes, do all the little things you can to take care of yourself. From what I know about you from here, you are a sweet and warm person and deserve all the best.

Doesn't it seem, sometimes, as though the medical profession exists to place roadblocks in the lives of us so called 'normal' people?

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

My surgery's apparently pretty common these days--I'm getting a hysterectomy for overlarge fibroids. Thus a fair amount of the fretting is, "I can't have any mini-Mauses, I'm a darwinian failure, blah blah blah"--which is utter bullshit, but my brain seems to want to do it anyway...Plus I'm a little phobic about the doctors anyway, which doesn't help much:/

Especially since your observation about doctors and roadblocks seems right on the money--it really really doesn't have to be this hard just to book a freakin' appointment:PPPPP

[halfmoon-mollie.livejournal.com]

I had the same operation when I was 36, for the same thing. Things are much simpler, after the recovery.

I think that doctors think they are above human decency because of WHAT they do. You know I read somewhere that you should never have to wait any longer than 15 minutes in a waiting room...you should get up and walk out if that happens.

Yeah. And then what, wait another six months for an appointment?

I'm sorry they're giving you such a hard time. When you have health worries, you don't need to be stonewalled as well.

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

That's the part I'm trying to keep in my mind...that I'll get it done, and get a chance to rest for a while...

I'm always suprised at just how many women get this operation...it's a little scary. You too? Was it scary for you? I know fibroids have something to do with hormones and whatnot, but nobody's really given me a good reason WHY we're all getting these things, why they get out of control, etc. My doctor just shrugged and said, "This stuff just happens" when I asked her.
It's mind-boggling:/

[halfmoon-mollie.livejournal.com]

I was scared because I didn't know what to expect. I had a couple of people who told me how I'd feel, and what might happen once the operation was over.

Because they told me what to expect, I was less afraid.

I"m sure you'll be scared, because after all you're having what amounts to major surgery. But you will feel SO much better when it's over. I looked forward to little things like being able to have 'nice' underwear, and not having to think about pms and all that.

this is a great time to have that surgery. No more yucky really horrible hot days.

I'm sure *they* know more about why and how, these days, but it's still a great big mystery to me. I know my mother had the same problem.

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry we missed your call the other night. I hope we can arrange a visit that doesn't intrude or disrupt. We'll keep it simple and low-key.

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I can try again tonight, if you guys are home...

I know the week of sept 13th is no good--that's my surgery date, and the days after I'll be lying on a couch and going "Unnnnnh"...but the week after I might be good for company, and I'll have the weekend off for a change. Watcha thinking of time-wise?

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

You have the weekend of the 23rd off?

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I think so...in theory I should be in better shape, though I'm told I'll get tired very easily and not want to be jostled much. So no horsyback riding for me, I guess:)

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

Our visits usually include a lot of walking. Not this time, young lady! We could maybe drive you to a nice quiet dinner, and then home again. You'll probably want to rest after that so we should leave you alone.

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

Hold on a sec, I'm looking at typical recovery times for hysterectomies and they mention 4-6 weeks. I wouldn't dream of imposing on you so soon!!

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

Hmm...my doctor told me 2 weeks...though just in case I've got HR's number in case I need to lengthen my sick time off...

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

Yeah, call tonight - we should be home all night.

[cynnerth.livejournal.com]

I'll be home around 6:15. Kevin probably won't be home until after 7.

[scentedwoods.livejournal.com]

I love that you put "yum yum" on your cake. Clearly all this current yuck hasn't ruined your sense of whimsy. Good!

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

It's the only thing keeping me (semi) sane lately...

Yum yum...

[roadskoller.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry you're freaking out, but I sure can understand why. It'll be so much easier for you later on I promise.
When you wake up and in your room, you should have a friend come and read to you. That helps. Of course, the nurses are going to keep you busy with all of their blood pressure and temperature taking.

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

That sounds like the best idea...It sounds like I might be swamped by visitors if I have to stay at the hospital, so I'll make them read Harry Potter at me or something:)

[bbcaddict.livejournal.com]

crap- sorry you have to have surgery- I'd sure be in that mode too!
awesome cake and yarn!!!
please take yarn pics! :P

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I've got some good ones--I just have to get off my lazy butt and download'em. I even knitted up one of the funky skeins into a cute bag:)

[sirreal13.livejournal.com]

Small Happy stuff is good. I like the idea of Dreamsicle yarn, but I can't think of what to wrap it around, except maybe a baby dragon.

Did you schedule a date for the.. uh.. eviction?

You have every right to be apprehensive, but little comforts can stop abject fear and dread from running your life. M'Luv has an eye concern that we need to go into urgent care for today. Growing old is a pain in the butt, but it beats the alternative... {{{Mausi}}}

[msfledermaus.livejournal.com]

I suppose...until they can make us bionic or something:)